The Sitting Space is a feature I’m starting to share what I’m learning from the things that I’m “sitting with” in my life.
So often we run–to alcohol, food, sex–from the feelings of our lives. I have decided to sit with mine. This feature is an expression of self-generosity that provides a space for me to be present.
It was over. No denying that. The door was shut.
All the dreams. All the hopes. All the plans.
All of it, irrelevant now.
I needed to find myself again. I needed to reconnect to Source. I needed to feel what it felt like to be me.
Uncertainty terrifies, but can also serve as a powerful teacher.
Uncertainty as Teacher
When my relationship ended, I stumbled, adrift.
Who am I, really?
I felt as if I had lost myself in the other. And so, I decided that I would spend a portion of each day sitting.
Sometimes I read. Sometimes I meditated or whispered a prayer. Sometimes I just sat and felt the warmth of the sun on my face as it set over the horizon.
I did whatever felt good. No agenda. No expectation. No preconceived notions.
Just me with myself. Being me. Decadent, luxurious and sacred–a holy hour.
Uncertainty as Friend
The quality of your life depends on the amount
of uncertainty you can live comfortably with.
Today, I am sitting with anxiety. Months after relocating to a new city, work is intermittent.
After years of searching, I have found something I love to do. Something that lights me up. Something that feeds my soul. But it doesn’t yet fully support me.
So I wonder and I doubt.
Will I make it?
Am I going to always feel like I’ve missed the mark?
What is next?
What I Know
Courage is presence in the face of uncertainty. Facing fear with composure. I don’t have the answers.
I do know that I am loved.
I do know that I am supported.
I do know that I live in a benevolent world.
And so I trust my highest wisdom. I lean on my unwavering faith in goodness. I leap into uncertainty’s open arms–again and again.
The Most Important Thing…
This moment–this Sitting Space–is transitory. Like everything in life, uncertainty fades. It is an early morning mist hovering across the surface of still waters, and it evaporates at the first ray of sunlight.
Today I sit with uncertainty, and I know that in a moment I shall stand up under the full light of the noonday sun.
So what is fear but an unreal expectation? Fear means believing that things never change. It means believing that life is not kind. It means believing that I am not enough.
Fear is a ridiculous thing.
I can sit with uncertainty and refuse fear a place at my table. So can you.
What Are You Sitting With Today?
What are you sitting with in your Sitting Space? What are you willing to sit with? What are you no longer willing to sit with?
I invite you to share your wisdom in the comments below. If you would like more insight in facing uncertainty, I invite you to download my free eBook, No Doubt, which has a whole section on facing uncertainty.